There is often a presumption in the hearts of both young and old that everyone is meant to marry. For some, not getting married is tantamount to not fulfilling their calling in life, while some do not even entertain the thought for a second. Such shame is inconceivable.
How many times have many single Christians shouted a thunderous ‘Amen!’ to prayers like “This year is your year of marriage!” “This year, your rich spouse will locate you,” etc?
Also, how many times have they prayed against forces from their ancestral lineage holding back their spouses? How many times have they given offerings as a ‘covenant of marriage’? Some of them did this for years.
Could it be that some have been praying wrongly or is it safe to presume that not everyone is supposed to marry since already, millions never get married in the first place, not to even speak of the divorce rate?
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The Eunuchs
Matthew 19:12 For there are eunuchs who were born that way; others were made that way by men; and still others live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it.
There are single people who were born to be that way, those made so by men, and those who have made themselves so because of the kingdom of heaven. Let anyone accept this who can. No one has the right to command others who want to accept it or not.
1 Corinthians 7:2 But because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband.
1 Corinthians 7:8 Now to the unmarried and widows I say this: It is good for them to remain unmarried, as I am.
1 Corinthians 7:28 … But those who marry will face troubles in this life, and want to spare you this.
Marriage is a beautiful thing, but it can also be scary. Letting another person into the most private areas of your life in an unprecedented way will cost you nearly everything accompanied by the risk of having it rejected.
Like reading the entire Bible and not just picking and choosing the parts we like, marriage must be embraced in its entirety for the best results.
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The Truth About Marriage
We were all warned that there would be challenges in marriage. Think about what wise people do when they expect obstacles. They either apply themselves to preparation for the event or decide to back away if they think it is not worth their time. People often say, “This is not for me” if they realize they won’t be willing to pay a heavy price for it. Like becoming a professional ballet dancer or a pilot, half-hearted attempts should not apply to those who wish to marry.
Since love is the main ingredient for marriage, loving should be what we practice. Not sexual practice, but daily acts that amount to true human love. This works best if we seek to please God and produce the fruit of the Spirit, particularly patience, kindness, and gentleness. Constant and regular practice of love will amount to building your love muscles.
So, before getting married, make sure you have a solid spiritual foundation, and don’t underestimate the importance of practicing the fruit of the Spirit. This will help you when your partner does something unexpected, such as throwing their clothes on the floor, and enable you to respond with patience and kindness.
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Finding Peace
According to Isaiah 54, our Maker is our husband. In 1 Corinthians 7, Paul suggests that it is good for the unmarried and widows to remain as he is. This portion of the scripture is often neglected, just like the portions on poverty. It is important to preach the whole truth and nothing but the truth.
Paul’s suggestion to remain unmarried does not mean that one should never marry or that it was a sin. He gave a reason for his suggestion in the same chapter, stating that there was a present distress and trouble everywhere. In fact, Paul goes on to say that if someone cannot control their desires, it is better for them to marry than to burn with desire.
Although some people may have no struggle with lust or desire, for others, it can be a constant battle. Nevertheless, we should prioritize our relationship with God above all else.
If marriage will cause more harm than good for you, do you think that maybe we should let it be?
READ ALSO: WHY DO WE MARRY?